Friday, January 15, 2010

How I survived an 18 day trip out East with 5 kids, a small budget, no GPS and no DVD player.


This is an article I wrote last summer. It is the one that inspired me to start a blog in the first place...though it is a bit out of date it gives my readers a good idea of the kind of nutty person I am. :)


(For clarification – My husband and I have 5 kids age 9,7,5,3 and 1) Okay – to start out I would say the most valuable asset for me was the advice of other friends – those who had gone there before me. Let’s face it – I have never done this before – we have taken 6 day trips – to the same location – before but never had we travelled this far, stayed in this many different places and had to bring this much gear in one vehicle before. So the advice of others was invaluable!! I made notes on where others had gone and liked, we changed our plans to include driving straight through the night due to one family’s experience, and I organized our clothing with the help of my “always organized” sister-in-law (God bless her!). I am not saying that I accepted any and every piece of advice given to us – I don’t think I could count on my fingers how many well-intentioned individuals advised us to have a DVD player available for this LONG and tedious trip. We rejected that one (as you can see from the title). Call me old fashioned, but I believe in watching the scenery, playing a word game as a family, reading, listening to music, doing math drills – whatever they can do to keep from being bored without resorting to the mind-numbing action of a ‘screen’. Besides that, do you think I wanted ANOTHER thing for them to argue over and whine about? “MOM, when can we watch another MOVIE?? MOOOOMMM????” I don’t think so. I will say a bit about organizing things for a moment. This was the part that overwhelmed me the most – we only got our ‘new’ minivan 2 weeks before departing so I was plagued with the question – will we have enough room for everything? Not only that but will I be able to keep things organized once we go? After much collaboration and trial and error, we settled with this. Bedding and tarps up top in the car carrier. 3 totes in the back trunk space – one for pantry items, like dishes and cereal, 1 for the childrens clothes (in which we packed each child’s in a separate reusable grocery bag – not a lot of clothes either – 2 shirts, 2 pants, 2 sweaters kind of thing – we can always do laundry!) and 1 for Bill and my clothes. Worked like a charm. Fridge, basin and coats and swimsuits went on top of these. I did have a small cooler at my feet at all times but I didn’t mind that. Kids had their knapsacks beside them or at least close by, filled with books, games and toys. We placed the playpen on the floor with the tents – thank goodness the kids legs are small and it doesn’t bother them at all. We were quite a sight I am sure – all crammed in, under our pillows! So – this is how it worked. We took off from Welland at 10:30 pm Sunday night– literally ‘stealing’ the kids out of their beds, placing them on the toilet, and buckling them in their seats. This was a sweet way to begin. No potty stops, no hungry bellies, just the sweet sound of snoring in the back seat. We made it to our campground in Quebec City by 9 am the next morning. We did not prearrange any of the campsites, by the way – two reasons – this was ‘off season’ ( ahh the perks of homeschooling!), so there was very little competition for good sites, and also we like to do some ‘flying by the seat of our pants’- it suits us well. I had prepared some food for our trip and much of it did last us through the first week. (Muffins, cookies, power bars, granola, bannock mixture, dehydrated ground beef) We visited grocery stores frequently and stored food in our plug in cooler (another thing borrowed – God bless them!) and we also have a Coleman stove with 3 elements on it – came in very handy. We stayed at friends 3 times – totalling 7 nights over the trip, (that makes 8 nights camping out, 1 night in a cottage and 2 nights driving right through) managed to only buy dinner out 3 times during the whole trip– either we stopped on the side of the road (those picnic spots are very handy) and cooked or made yet another set of peanut butter sandwiches for the road. We often got little things like fries or ice cream, or one order of fish and chips – to share, so it didn’t seem like we were depriving anyone too much – We prepared great meals; beef stir fry, spaghetti, quesadillas, beef vegetable stew, mac and cheese – somehow food tastes better when you’re on the road – maybe we were hungrier?? Was this a vacation for me too? Surprisingly it was – I said to a friend before we left that this vacation was not for me – it was for the kids. I needed to have that in my head to avoid any disappointments I as a mom might have over it. Really, this was the kid’s time to see a bit of our country, learn a little about our history and other cultures, have some fun and see some old friends. After about the 3rd day in I realized not only was I NOT exhausted or overwhelmed, I was having a lot of FUN!! And I continued to do so…now we did have great weather – only rained 3 times while we camped and that was always in the night and not before having to pack up, so that made it good – but it was more than that. The kids were relaxed (I have read that moms see ‘changes’ in their kids during “No-TV week” – less arguing, less stress, more compliant – and I wonder at that), generally pretty easy going and genuinely amazed at how beautiful their country was. Also, my husband and I did not argue – he succumbed to my crazy ‘budgeting tactics’ – though towards the last day he did say, when referring to the word ‘economical’ that I had apparently used a time or two “If I hear that word again – so help me….!!” And so I did let him buy us ALL dinner out and I DID NOT make the noodles and sauce that I had planned to make at the next picnic spot to get us through. Ah compromise – I know - you are probably thinking – is she crazy? Does she expect ME to travel like that? No restaurant food? No fast-food? No easy life? See for me – I love to cook – so it is not a stress to cook fresh food, I also love to save money so that is another automatic reinforcement for me, and I also see how fast food effects my family – my husband gets migraines, my kids get irritable, and I don’t feel that good either - so why put that on myself? Much better to go this way, I think. I guess the reason why I am writing this blurb is not to have you say – kudos to me – I want you to say – hey – I can do that – hey I don’t need to spend loads of money to go on vacation and I certainly do NOT have to succumb to peer pressure (or even kid pressure) to use the DVD player in the van!! What DID we do before those things anyway? Something like family time I think it was called… By the way, both my 9 year old and 6 year old love to read maps now – I worked hard to include them as we planned our route and even when we got lost – they are now much more interested in seeing a map – would that have happened with a GPS?...likely not. Anyway those are my thoughts so far about the best trip I have ever taken – and oh – if you are wondering – the best part was PEI, Lunenburg NS and Cape Breton – Cabot Trail – wow – must see and must go!!

Sarah

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

World Hunger. Thinking about it...

Okay - you're going to think I am really lazy today. Here is another friend's post. Weird, I was just incredibly burdened with this topic over the last day or so and then read her blog. Great points.http://treeandtwigheirlooms.blogspot.com/2009/11/big-picture.html

A friend's post: Truth

I have a friend who posted on his blog today. I have been feeling like I need to write, but sort of 'out of words'. His words I think are perfect so head on over to his blog and check it out...http://www.theilliteratescribe.com/2009/11/one-among-many.html
Hope that's okay with you Matt. Something tells me it is...

Saturday, October 17, 2009

A Living God for a Living Education

I feel that I struggle to clarify my spiritual ideas and thoughts on paper or in word. The author of this book that I am reading - A Charlotte Mason Companion by Karen Andreola - sings to the same tune as me and I find myself nodding emphatically and getting out my orange highlighter frequently. This chapter at the beginning of her book is just so in line with my heart, and it is so encouraging to read. CM had a real love for her Saviour - in her books she calls him names like: our King, the Chief amongst ten thousand, and the altogether lovely. What an intimate relationship she had with Jesus Christ and it comes through time and time again.
Here is a quote that I must copy from CM herself - remember written a whole 130 years ago or so:
"To bring the human race, family by family, child by child, out of the savage and inhuman desolation where He is not, into the light and warmth and comfort of the presence of God, is no doubt, the chief thing we have to do in the world. And this individual work with each child, being the most momentous work in the world, is put into the hands of the wisest, most loving, disciplined and divinely instructed of human beings. Be ye perfect as your Father is perfect, is the perfection of parenthood, perhaps to be attained in its fullness only through parenthood. There are a few mistaken parents, ignorant parents, a few indifferent parents, even one in a thousand, callous parents; but the good that is done upon the earth is done, under God, by parents, whether directly or indirectly...the highest duty imposed upon him, it is also the most delicate; and he will have infinite humility, gentleness, love, and sound judgment, if he would present his child to God and the thought of God to the soul of his child"

Now I know that lots of you reading this won't agree with everything said here - but hey - I guess that is why this is my blog and not yours ;). Let me highlight a few things that jump out at me. My chief job to do in this world is to bring my children in to the presence of God - present my child to God and the thought of God to the soul of my children. I spoke in my last blog about thinking. It's Deuteronomy 6 when just after the 10 commandments are given - God says to the people to 'write the laws on their hearts - impress them on their children, talk about them when you walk, lie down, get up'. I am not talking about some legalistic religion here - I am talking about talking about Him - thinking about Him - for me to be breathing Him in and then breathing Him out on my children. This is my highest duty, and also my most delicate - let's face it, I'm not a delicate person, but yet this job of parenting and of introducing the 'thought of God' to my children, is to be handled delicately - purposefully and wisely. What a calling. But by the Grace of God I go...
sarahjane

What a Child Should Have...

Charlotte Mason said that each day a child should have:
  • something or someone to love
  • something to do
  • something to think about

If I can achieve these three things for all five of my children than I am doing something right. I like breaking it down to three things, like a checklist. We all like checklists don't we? This parenting gig is challenging but oh so rewarding.

Something to love - Everybody needs something to love, whether it be a dog, a guinnea pig, parents, siblings. "There are opportunities for love in every home. There are also many ways to provide services (labors of love) to others if you look for them."

Something to do - By this she meant of course - something worthwhile to do! Have we lost our creativity? Are we so busy figuring out what show is on next, or website to hook our kids into that we have forgotten how many other things there are to do? Things of great value. Now, these are never easy are they? When our child says they are bored - as children will quite often - it becomes our responsibility to either (a) entertain them or (b) put the tv on. Wait a second what happened to option (c) teach them to entertain themselves? We are raising a generation of children that expect to be entertained - carted from one activity to another, amused with one game, playmate or another. Option (c) is the hardest option - at first - but then come the rewards. Teach them to sew, and you have a child making her own outfits for her dolls within a month or two; take them out on Nature Studies and then watch them take the initiative on their own to take their sketchbook out and draw a picture of that beautiful leaf they found on the lawn. I did find by the end of the summer, the kids were getting more squirrely - bickering, bored, what have you, and I have had friends ask me how I homeschool because this is their only experience with their children at home. But as soon as we started back to school - focused attention (giving them lots of things to think about) - the "something to do" has gone back to smooth and easy again. Too much idleness makes for ...something...not good...what was that saying my mother used to say?

I suppose that really finding something to do, depends on the last point being followed...

Something to Think About - Here is another quote from Karen Andreola that I just must copy "Children who are not given something to think about grow up at best with two ideas: to work hard and to amuse themselves when they are working...amusement is not an adequate substitute for something to think about...When children are guided to seek after something to think about during their home life, they will continue this habit throughout their lives." Okay- that's what I want for my babies - yup. No questions asked. Think about it (no pun intended) - how many of us were 'really' encouraged to think - and of course given great things from which to stem our thoughts when we were young? Living books? I am responsible for giving my children the best that this world has to offer - not money wise of course - but content wise. I want my children to find "joy and refreshment" in what they read - digging in to the text and pulling out what they can in their own words (narration!).

There - did I give you something to think about?

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Scheduling Part 2

Well, here I am over one month later, and I am sure some are wondering (as am I some days) how successful my scheduling has been. Well, the fact that I have not blogged once during the last month is likely a good example of how it has gone - not perfect! This is where I begin to tweek some more. There are days, when everything goes as planned and there is much accomplished in a given day. I would say that the schedule is much more effective for the children than for me. I will try to explain why, and I am sure many of you moms will certainly understand. The children have been great at staying on schedule - up until about 2:30 in the afternoon, anyway. My son especially (who is 7) loves to watch the clock, set the timer and carry on whether mommy is present or not - which is tremendous! His sister, who is almost 10, seems strangely more dependent on me to give reminders and a little nudge here and there. Is this a gender thing? Or is it a birth order thing? Or a characteristic of themselves? Not really sure but it is interesting to note. I am doing short lessons (remember!) so the morning can go by at a farely good clip hopping quickly from subject to subject. That is working very well - they are generally working diligently during their 15-30 minute time period and I very rarely see them doddle. I really love that! Nothing erks me more than a doddling student...not that it is all about me...it is really about helping them to develop good work habits! :)
Now, about me - how are my work habits you might be asking? Well, generally I usually have a really good start to it. I am consistently starting my day at 6 am or soon thereafter, do my stuff, get them going with breakfast, start in with some extra chores or baking, and then by 9 am the schedule is no longer followed. Whether that is due to my work habits or just my life with five ALIVE children under 10, I will leave that for you to decide. I feel very much that I am needing to change my portion of the schedule greatly. I mean, I have things like - on Mondays: ironing or mending at 10 AM!! Come on - I think I have done that once - there is very rarely a day that I am not changing a baby's bum or helping a child through their language arts lesson - or - what really I don't know!!??? The mornings just fly by! I am not sure what I was thinking scheduling my life like that - I just want to avoid having things like that (ironing - it sits in our room till it has to get washed again from the dust!) to do in the evening or leaving them till I can't even think about it anymore! So - though it does need some serious revisions I would say generally it is helping us to maintain a more productive and routine life. There are so many days though where the whole thing halts - a phone call, a shift to work, a field trip - and I am learning to accept those days too. I think maybe that is what makes it so hard to get back in to it after days like that. If only I could have a month with no interruptions - THEN we would be right on track by the end of that - habits would be instilled!!
Oh - speaking of habits - the last thing I will mention this post! I woke about 3 weeks ago with a great idea that has worked really well for our family. Although I am a die hard Charlotte Mason gal - and her being very, I would say "not" for Behavioral Modification, I still have a lot of that kind of training under my belt and I can't help but use it with my kids - SO combining those two seeds of thought, I decided that we would begin (drum roll please...) the 5 DAY CHALLENGE!! I made a chart with 5 days at the top and 3 bedrooms in the columns at the sides. Then I said to the kids - "Okay - at 8 am every morning for 5 days straight we are going to inspect one another's bedrooms - including mommy and daddy's and if everything is cleaned off the floor - and I mean every little thing that does not belong then they PASS and they get a check mark! If at the end of the five days we ALL have check marks then we will get ice cream!" (which at our house is really special). The reason why ALL of us have to have straight Passes was to make it more cooperative and less competitive - this was a family Challenge!! So at 8 am, for five days straight we did just that - now the first day was the hardest, but by the end of the week we had done it! Now for some of you this probably doesn't seem like a big deal (I know - some of you have houses where there is very little on the floor for longer than 30 minutes)but to me, with all these little toys and little girls that play all day every day- it has been HUGE - I now can walk down my hallway and see tidy bedrooms - every day (they already were making their beds by then for their morning routines - so that is a bonus). So - once we had that first taste of ice cream - we did the 10 DAY CHALLENGE - with success!! And now we are on to our 15 day challenge. After this I plan to reintroduce the 5 Day challenge again but this time - the floors AND the dressers have to be clean and tidy!! My 9 year old said to me the other day - "it is so nice to walk in to my room in the dark and not have to worry about stepping on something" - yep, I agree!! One little step at a time - pain free and delighted!
God bless - and hey - have a great Thanksgiving - I am SO thankful!
Sarahjane

Saturday, September 5, 2009

Scheduling my Life


I read this book this summer. "Managers of their Homes". I became convinced that it is a good idea to have a schedule for my family. I have seen too many hours wasted away in our home - having good intentions to complete projects and get certain subjects done doesn't seem to make much difference. So - I have become a scheduler! Here is a picture of my colourful work in progress - this is the step before the "master list" that I will done before this day is through. (the yellow is Bill, orange me, red Rowe, blue Alex, yellow Elisa and pink Mia - no I didn't schedule baby Bekah!!)


We have been implementing portions of it over the last month or so. The first stage - what I will call Phase One was a scary one for me. I needed to begin waking up at 6 am and going to bed by 10 pm. I have been struggling with this one for years - always pregnant or nursing a newborn, it seems like, this has been an impossibility! Well now I do not have that excuse (I guess that's a good thing...{sigh}) so now I can start to get myself where I want to be! Let me tell you - getting up at 6 am at the beginning was not easy. I have been rising, up until this point, at 7 am or later - depending when the kids woke up. The children are always hungry at this time of day, and of course I felt like I was hopping out of bed and running a marathon right from the outset. Now, oh what a reward! I wake to silence. (and it certainly has gotten easier!) I have a shower, or start laundry, maybe tidy a few things up and by 6:30 I am ready to have my time sitting with God and His Word withOUT falling asleep again (that was a big tip in this book - work on something first to get yourself awake - I had never thought of that before). My 5 year old usually wakes up before 7 but I have taught her to STAY in her room till 7 and by then breakfast (almost always a pot of oatmeal) is ready to be eaten. At this point I drag the big ones out of bed, they come to the table dressed, faces washed, beds made and ready to eat. We all finish breakfast by 7:30, Rowe and Allie (9 and 7) do their morning routines (including cleaning the kitchen table and bathroom) and an 'extra' chore such as wash a window or clean the microwave (can you tell I'm loving this?) and by 8 we are all ready to start the day. (and that's only the first 2 hours!)

Now - a word about overscheduling cause I am thinking you might be thinking what my husband feels - I don't want my whole life scheduled! And I agree that I don't want to be a slave to my schedule - feeling pressured to perform right on the mark and not vary from that. But so far something amazing is happening through this schedule, and that's why I decided to include it in my blog. Somehow I actually feel MORE calm about our days, I feel MORE free then ever before - I am not constantly feeling like I am getting nothing accomplished, because I know I will either get to it later, or I know it will happen in some shape or form. Bill has reminded me that recently we heard a man, Joe Boot (check him out at http://www.westminsterchapel.ca/) explain that if we did not have the Law of Gravity we would not have the FREEDOM to move around in it. That might be in the right direction of how I am thinking with this schedule thing. Not until I begin to live as one "under" the law or the schedule do I have the freedom to truly experience life as it is meant to be lived.

I have not scheduled a lot of Bill's time - his choice - and mine too really - I know he wouldn't live by it right now. His schedule for work is so all over the place that it would be difficult anyway, but I have his mornings a bit scheduled in that a different day of each week he will spend 30 min-1 hour with a different child doing something one on one together (Baseball, biking, a project, reading etc.) and he will be teaching history to the kids. I am hoping this is successful. I think we all need a bit of structure -there have been just too many weeks that go by and we say - what have we really accomplished? He also has a chore list - very easy and minor (ie. Mondays - garbage) but just to keep him and I accountable for the work that gets done around the house. My chore list is quite a bit more involved but that's because I am more on board with this and this IS my workplace now. I have done this mainly to alleviate doing ALL my house cleaning on Saturdays - making for a miserable weekend. The kids and I have divided the work up throughout the week and it leaves very little to be done on Saturday - I will let you know how that goes too :)

I know I homeschool and I know that lots of people looking at this don't homeschool, but I think you might want to consider scheduling the time that you are home, making you and your family more productive with the time that we do have home with our spouses and/or children.

Something to think about.

Oh, by the way - I didn't schedule Saturdays - my blogging is an "extra" right now that I just happened to make time for today since there is so much free time! So far so good...